Welcome to LaWorld.

2011-03-25T14:10:00.002+08:00

I feel I regret so much in choosing this course I'm in. It's not my first choice. I merely included in as one of my choices because, yeah, there are no more other courses in SP or NP I feel I'm interested in. Now that I'm already past the first year in this course, I feel like I should have considered and chose courses in RP as well. :(( Another two more years. Endure, persevere Aqilah! You can do it. Yeah, nursing is not my thing.. but, it's okay, I'll go along with the flow. Although I don't see myself in nursing after Poly, it's okay, take it as a learning experience. Right?

2011-03-23T16:01:00.002+08:00

Part 2 23/03/11

Life's been a roller coaster ride for me. Especially at this phase of my life. Well, gotta learn and stay strong.

You know, I've been waiting. Waiting for him... I'm waiting, and it's been that long. I let go of the last one, cause I caare for him.. Though I still see him around school sometimes. Which puts a smile on my face. :))

Year 1's over, and Year 2's almost here. Insyallah I will do well in Year 2. I really hope I'll make some good close friends, at least one good close friend. I really hope I'll enjoy school more, even with my friends. I hope our chemistry's great as a class. Insyallah. Amin. :)

And, I wanna buy a side bag, and another or two pair of shoes. Urgh. Oh yeah, maybe gonna get a part time job too. Gonna try and work during school time as well.

Okay, I'll try to update more often as I can. I pity my blog for neglecting it too much you know.. Haha. Gotta go. Later!

xoxo

Aqilah

2011-03-23T15:49:00.003+08:00

Part 1 23/03/11

Hello. Wow, haven't been updating. What's the point of keeping a blog without regularly updating it eh? It's already almost the end of Mar. During this month, gfs FaRaLeenQiShaNa and I celebrated four of our birthdays which fell on the month of Mar at Habourfront's Wave. Happy Belated Birthdays to Suhana, me, Amira and Fatin! It's good that our birthdays are so near to each other. ;))

Updates. One week after my birthday, I met him for the first time. I was kinda surprised when I saw him. He wasn't what I expected, but, *shrugs*. He himself was a bit surprised when he saw me he said. Haha. He's okay. He's nice and everything. Onllllly that turn-off part in the beginning. Can you believe this. After I've withdrawed some cash, he told me to wait as he was gonna meet some friends. So I waited. After that, he texted saying he's gonna hang around with his friends for a while and asked me to wait or walk around first. Can you believe this? I was surprised and I waited for some 10 mins before making my way to the library when he caught up with me anyway. Guys aren't suppose to do that, especially during first dates. It's a big n0-no. Well, whatever. We watched Rango. It was a nice and funny cartoon comedy. After that we went home.

I'm still texting him. But honestly, after our first date, I don't like him like him. I only regard him as a friend. So.. I'll be telling him very soon, I guess. I don't wanna lead him on.

So. I'm having my holidays right now. This is the last week and I'll be starting my 3 week attachment next week. -.- Oh boy. Really hope it goes well and fun. Insyallah. Amin. I wanna hang out more with gfs. I MISSSS them loads. And btw, when are my bro and I gonna move back to bp?? *sigh*

2011-02-17T16:23:00.005+08:00

Remember in the last post I said I thought he probably didnt want to text me anymore? When he texted again, he said his phone died and he didn't had any charger for his phone at his aunt's p;ace. Well. It's been a month already that him and I are texting each other. After I got back from aunt's house in Johor (spent a few nights there during the CNY holidays), there was something different about him. He didn't text me in the morning as early as 5 plus anymore. Sometimes he would text me in the morning around 6 or 6 plus, sometimes he would even text me at 9am, for example. Like he doesn't really care anymore. I wonder if cous heard me and one of his sisters, Girl Girl talking. And if he had, which I'm sure he did, I wonder if he told him once he got back to camp. So far, he hasn't say anything about that. Sometimes I just feel we've drifted apart, even though we've just known each other for a month.

Anyway.. I'm looking forward to meeting him. Cause I wanna know how he looks like, how he actually is. I want to get to know more about him. I wanna see if he actually meets my criteria, not in a way that he has to be cute or anything, but if I can get along fine with him. I know there are some guy friends I can get along with, joking and everything and I'm totally comfortable with. I wanna see if he can be like them. If he does, I won't right away be his girlfriend, no way. I like to take time and see how it really goes. If he's not what I'm looking for, we are still friends. But I hope it won't crushed him too much. I hate making guys crushed.

So far he's okay. Only about that one thing I kinda have issues with. I'm not used to people like him, really. When I first found out, I made sure I was still breathing. I was really suprised. I wish I hadn't known, really. But still, I should just treat it as if I didn't know. Why should I shun away from him right. It's just scary (hints).

2011-01-23T18:41:00.005+08:00

Last week, it was the first time him texting me. The first text I ignored. I was like who the heck is this. I thought maybe just a random person texting another random person. He probably doesn't even know who I am. But when he texted again a few days later past my bedtime, he introduced a bit of himself, I decided to reply the next day. I was quite curious to how he got my no. Of course. Sheesh. Thaat boy.

We started texting each other then, and it's been a week. Last Sun when I told him lets not text each everyday, he was like, "Sedih tak leh msg lagi". Haha. But then, we would text each other in the morning at 5 plus and again after I end school. However, since a few days ago, he's been...like disappearing. At first, he would be enthuastic in texts, but now. He doesn't sound that enthuastic anymore. And he would reply me one hour later etc. Today, when I texted him, he still hadn't reply. It's unlike him.

I was prepared to give him a chance. He was looking for a girl. I am still looking for a guy. But I know if he's not the one then I can't do anything about it. So far he has been okay. Although I still don't know how he looks like. But now, I feel he's avoiding me or something. I think he has already lost his interest. Lost interest huh. I don't really mind. But at least tell me you don't wanna continue texting me if you want to move on. Tell me if you're a man. Don't keep me waiting, with doubts.

I guess it was just a short wishful thinking. I only knew him for a week. I don't even know how he is really like. I don't even know how his voice's like. I thought I was really slowly starting to accept him, like him, but...well, I guess there is an ending to every start. I really hope if he's decided to move on, don't wanna continue texting me, I really hope he will at least tell me that, soon. It isn't nice to keep a girl waiting, you know..

2011-01-09T16:49:00.002+08:00

My name's Aqilah, and I'm destined to lead a life like this. My bro and I have been strong although we've fallen time and again. But the good thing so far, we aren't broken. I see others, I see how fortunate they are. They are soo fortunate. But me, I'm considered fortunate, only they are better than me. I dunno who I am. I'm not sure if I was the person I am a few years back. Sometimes I think I've changed. It's like a rebellion is happening between the positive and negative part of me. Sometimes I'm so confused. I get frustrated, I get stressed out, I feel like I'm gonna fall hard. My life is so desperately sad I hope Allah is planning something good for me, and my brother. Mum's gone, and dad's far away that I'm soo used to without him being here by my side. I now know exactly how Harry Potter feels. The way people and teachers look at me. I know. But the thing is, I don't feel reeaally sad because of my mum or dad. I feel sad, because I feel there's no freedom here for us. We are teenagers, and we feel like a bird desperately wanting to get out of it's cage. I feel so helpless sometimes. I know I've got some great friends, I know I can confide in them anytime I want. But somehow, I make myself better by singing and crying. I dunno.. Maybe I feel that because I don't see them everyday I don't confide in them. But I know it's only a phone call away.

I know I gotta be strong. For myself and bro. My bro's probably the worst hit. If I'm not strong, who's gonna be there for him when he needs a listening ear? Sometimes, people just misjudge and misunderstand him. Just because he used to be a spoiled brat doesn't mean he will be forever. I hate this part of my life, and I wish, my bro and I could move back and live at our house in BP. I want us to lead a normal life again. Do you ever leave your house and always feel not wanting to go home? We do loads of times. Whenever I have a great time outside with friends, I dread coming to this stupid house. We never feel at ease here. It's okay. we'll celebrate our freedom when I turn 21, another two years to go. Two years is actually fast, mind you. But for me and my bro, it's that slow. Whatever it is, people, you've got to be strong if you're in a better situation than me. I'm always sad. I've got full of hatred and sadness. I sympathize with myself. But I gotta be strong. Now is not the time for me to break up into pieces. It's the time to face reality and be a stronger person. I know it's meant for us to be. I know.

2010-12-17T18:16:00.002+08:00

When he looked at me, I wonder if what went through my mind is what he's thinking. But I don't prefer boys who girls are so head over heels on. It irks me. As in, not irk irk. But irk kind of chase me away from him. To me, going for a boy who everyone is gaga with gives competition. I dont want too much competition. It's just.. as if he's so popular. Me, like a so-called-popular guy? In your dreams.

He can be any girl's dream guy. But in order for a guy to steal my heart away takes some effort, like seriously. I just knew him like, what, for two weeks. Before that, yeah, I've seen him around. But I didn't reeaally know him then. Well, anyway, he comes from a different world. Well that's too bad isn't it.

2010-12-08T18:14:00.002+08:00

It hurts. But I'll know if it'll still hurt once attachment's over.

The music tells me what to feel
I like you now, but is it real?
By the time we say goodnight
I'll know if this is right

And I feel you
Comin through my veins
Am I into you?
Or is the music to blame?

[Chorus:]
Who owns my heart?
Is it love?
Or is it art?
Cause the way you got your body movin's
Got me confused
I can't tell if it's the beat or sparks
(Oh)
Who owns my heart?
Is it love?
Or is it art?
Y-Y-Y-You know I wanna believe
That we're a masterpiece
But sometimes it's hard to tell in the dark
Who owns my heart?

Like I said, I'll know once attachment's over. But I know this ain't real. It's just a dream.

2010-09-27T12:16:00.003+08:00

Me and my bro

My cousin, Tasha

Fatin and me

Girlfriends

Farid and me

These are my Raya photos that I took. I've got more but these are some of them. I will be posting more which I took more recently, which was last Sat soon. :))

Tomorrow, maybe girlfriends and I will be coming down to Pasir Ris Park where Hui Luan, one of my other dearest girlfriends has organized a gathering. Actually, she and some of the others whom she invited (5A and 5B) are spending two nights at a chalet there. They are checking in today and checking out on Wed morning. Cool. Wish girlfriends and I could go. But even my mum wouldn't allow. I know that. But that's okay. As long as I get to spend some time with dearest friends there, it's okay. ;)) Hope Adleen, Suhana and Aisha will go though tomorrow. It's comfirmed that Fatin and Amira are going. Maybe we'll go cycling, kite-flying or even go to the Escape Theme Park! Cool. The last time I went to theme park was 6 years ago. I still remember. Okay, hope tomorrow will be a fun and great
day. Insyallah. Amin. :DD

2010-08-27T12:26:00.002+08:00

Afternoon, it's a lovely day, isn't it? Raining and all?

I need to update this blog. It's sooo dusty.

The last few posts were about a guy right? Okay, that's the past and I've moved on. Seriously. I don't think I know him that well yet, I don't wanna rush into things. He's just within my friends circle right now, and nothing more. :)

You know, I've been waiting for the right one for sooo long. I wonder if he's just right infront of me, and I haven't realised yet. I want someone whom I know well, whom I know and trust. I want a great guy, someone whom I can get along with. I realised, that I can't rush into things. I have to take things slowly. No matter how long I've waited, I haave to keep in mind that long-time friendship is important. I'm like Edward from Twilight, waiting for the right one. He's been waiting for like, 90 years. And he finally found the right one, Bella.

Hmm. Nevermind. If he's meant to appear right now, he will. If I'm meant to wait, then I will.

Okay, so how's fasting everyone? Endure alright? I'm enduring, you should too! Haha. Okay, so been preparing for the Raya celebrations? My bro and I have bought our baju kurungs when we went Geylang on Monday. It's light brown, and there's a tinge of orange. Haha. Love it! Finally, been searching for the baju kurung. Must have connection you seee. Haha. Finally, I have a connection with this baju kurung from a boutique. Yup, bought our baju kurungs from a boutique. Different boutique though. So this is the third week of fasting. Hari Raya is coming soon, hope all of my Muslim friends will enjoy their Raya celebrations. And of course, can't wait to visit and see ex-Sec school mates! Missed them loads. Haha.

Gotta go for know. Catch ya later. Gotta study for exams next two weeks. Later!! :))

P.s Yesterday's outing with gfs was great, although tiring. ;)) And happy fasting! :D

2010-07-13T14:07:00.012+08:00

I know. I've not forgotten, totally about him.

I see him again, and that feeling comes in. I'm trying to forget him now. He doesn't need to sit beside me, I don't need to sit beside him. It doesn't matter now. Don't worry Aqilah. You'll be fine. Even when he sees you, looks at you and don't even smile, only with that expression, it's okay. I know we are still be friends, maybe someone whom I can trust (of course I can), crazy crazy as always. Haha. I can get along with him. It's okay, when you see me and you walk away, don't worry, I'll be alright. Only those few words, it's alright, I'm still okay. Cause I know you are still my friend, and I'm still yours. :)

If I were to only given a minute or something to live, I would wanna tell you this. "That message, which I also wanted to answer your question
about my dance class, that message didn't get sent in the end. I wanted to say, that I would wait and not give up. But something you said during one of those few days made me changed my my mind in sending the message. "I like you because of not puppy love you know. I'm not sure why. I'm giving you up because... because we can't be together. It's okay, I will move on. I will and I can. I just want to let you know I like you for you, not for puppy love."

2010-07-07T12:39:00.008+08:00

Afternoon! I will be going offline soon. I've just edited a photo of me. It took the comp soo long for the photobucket website to upload my image in the edit area. I tried and tried, it just stucked there. In the end, I did a search for othr edit sites, and voila! FotoFlexer saved the day! Haha. I totally forgot about the website. It's partner is Photobucket, so both have similar tools. Well, check it out.

The first photo was just edited. I like. The second one is just another photo taken. Haha. Just trying to humour myself here. Hahaha.

Okay, gonna go now. Gotta go get something from the NTUC later. How I wiish the NTUC's just near my block like it was in Senja. Sigh. Okay!

Later!!

xxx

Aqilah

1.24pm

2010-07-06T11:20:00.003+08:00

Morning.

Since I'm free at the moment, I reeaally should be concentrating on finishing my holiday assignments. Seriously. No questions asked.

Next week, Term 2 starts for us. Omg. I should be concentrating on studies once new term starts. There will be only 4 weeks till exams, YOG (2 weeks), attachment and vacation. Time will fly fast, and I won't have time to SLACK. Okay, friend just called. I have to meet her and the rest for CNP project later at school. Sigh. She toold me last minute, she forgoot about me.

I can't wait to see girlfriends again. I'm not sure if I can go this Sat. Will ask my aunt. Miss them very much.

Gotta go. I reeally hope we'll finish the project by today. Seems like I can't continue with my CNP assignment today. Sigh.

Later!

2010-07-01T15:24:00.002+08:00

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

2010-07-01T14:24:00.008+08:00

Hello!! It's been a loooong time since my last post! I'm free today, and was yesterday, so I've decided to post today! My blog is getting dusttyyy. It's 1st of July, and wow, time flies fast! And that means... The Twilight Saga: Eclipse is out today in theatres! Yeess! Haha. I'm so excited. Can't wait to watch, especically with the FaRaLeenQiShaNa. Haha. And now I can install iTunes on my computer. Yes! Haha.

Okay, in early June, I had my CT for five of the seven subjects I take. The other two, marks will be based on projects and assignments. Omg. Okay, I've gotten my results for three of the five. Here they are:

Microbiology (MIC): C
Anatomy and Physiology (AAP): B+
Nursing Skills Labaratory (both practical and theory): B

Omg, omg, I got Bs! Haha. I'm soo happy especially for my AAP! Alhamdullilah, amin. I could laugh as if the grades I got are funny. Haha. I got C for MIC, but that's okay. I'll work harder and I'll work hard for its practical as well (gulps). I dunno when I'll get the results of FON and PAS. I hope I'll get at least a B, if not an A. Insyallah, amin.

After CT week, it was my two weeks attachment. Made some friends, learned some things, and uuseful things they are. I also enjoyed my attachment overall. I went to St Luke Eldercare (Bk Timah Centre), HPB, St Luke Community Hospital and of course, Queenstown Poly. I'm gonna miss the Poly. Duuh. I was attached to it for a week. Okay. Haha. I also made friends with some of the nurses, not really friends, but you get what I mean.

Now that the two weeks attachment are over, it's my two weeks break. Yeeaah. Break, with projects to do, to finish. Sigh. Maybe I should've opted for RP huh? At least I got dearest gfs there. Okay, here's an update. Last week, I would say I like someone. We just know each other, and I tell you, you talk to him can kecoh. Not kecoh as in there are many things to talk about, it's kecoh as in you can argue with him and it may never ends. But it's argue nice, not argue bad. Imaginelah. Haha. I can take a popcorn and munch while watch him argue with a friend. He's nice, you can joke with him, and I came to this impression that he likes to lie. He lies about this and that, but still, you can take him as a nice friend. And there will come this laughter. Haha. Oh, and he likes to sleep. Haha.

After a few days, I roughly know how he's like. I can sit down with him, only us, and chat. Then, I started to develop feelings for him. But I didn't wanna like him. I knew it's probably just my imagination, not real. Then, on the last day I saw him, I told him: "If I like you, wld you accept me?". I didn't talk, I wrote in his Notes application in his Ipod. Haha. At first, I wanted to just say it. I told him I wanna tell him something. We were already alone, others had gone for lunch. He said what it was. But when I turned to him and opened my mouth, the words would get stuck in my throat. I tried a few times. He got curious, and even asked me, "Eh, you did domething wrong ah?". Haha. I looked at him, and I was surprised. His face was serious, and underneath it, I know he cared. There was concern, for a friend. Behind his immaturity that I pointed out (although I had a feeling he has his mature side), I saw for the first time, his mature side. Of course I said no. Haha.

The words were still stuck and in the end, he gave his Ipod and asked me to write on the Notes application. I took it, and began typing. It wasn't very long, and he held out his hand. I stiiill didn't want to let go of the Ipod. In the end, he was like, "Okaylah, if you don't want to tell, don't tell. I won't force you.". I said no, I want to tell. Then he said okay. And after a few moments, I finally showed the note to him. His face was concentrating, then changed when he got the message. I asked him, "So?" He even like sat in this certain position and thought about it. He said no. I asked a few times. He finally said, we become friends first, then slowly2 see how. I was satisfied with that answer. Then came, he asked me to sit besiiide him during lectures cause he's shy around my friends, and I said he should sit beside me during lectures cause I'm shy with his friends. Haha. Cause I said, even as friends first, we wouldn't be able to know each other better cause we aren't from the same class, only same lectures. When we see each other, we would just smile or nod. He confidently said noo lah. And I confidently elaborated more.

The point is, we just know each other. It's because of that, that he rejected me. He thinks it's puppy love, like for only a few days and then it will go away. I told him in an sms, that it's not. I don't just like someone cause he's cute, or handsome or whatever. Aaand he changed the subject. But now, I'm gonna forget about him. I'll take him as a friend. Like crazy crazy, as always. I can trust him, cause I know his secret, and he knows mine. He knows I like him. I'll treat him as a friend.

"I caught a butterfly, and now I
have to release it. It and I can't
be together. We're from different worlds."

And okay, when are we going to watch Eclipse? Of course, can't wait to see the others on Aisha's birthday party on 17 July! Soo excited!

Later!!

xxx

Aqilah :D :D

P.S He called yesterday, asking me if I wanted to watch movie (as a friend) with the others today. Knight and Day. We had a nice chat. "What wroong numbeeer." Haha. :)

3.18pm

2010-05-18T16:12:00.002+08:00

Sunday's outing to Marina Square, Esplanade and Bugis was fun! It was okay. :) At least I got to see all of them again!, except for Aisha who left for work even before I could meet her. Lil bro tagged along. I asked him if he wanted to follow, and he willingly said yes. Provided that me going out with friends are girlfriends, not the whole class. So, gave the birthday girl, Adleen my present for her! Hope she likes it.

Anyway, checked FB just now. There's this one class photo from our Sec 2 days and one of our former classmates tagged us with the picture, and so goes the long comments from various people. Haha. I can't believe that that picture still exists. It was taken like four years ago with Mr Afiq, our then co-form teacher. Omg. Haha. All of our faces. Haha. We looked so different! Haha. Missed those days. It was great.

Okay, got to buy the nursing uniform tomorrow. Gotta buy the shoes for nursing as well. Shut! Oh noo. Insyallah, I'll be fine. Insyallah I'll look okay. Insyallah. Amin.

Aqilah, you are a strong girl. Be yourself. You have friends who love you, your family who loves you as well. So stop thinking of the negative thoughts. You are doing fine now. Don't make things unfine. Act as if you're alone in your course. Oh! I'm so myself when I'm alone! Okay? Got it, Aqilah. (winks) :)

xoxo

2010-05-15T11:51:00.004+08:00

Sometimes when I faced this blank post, the things I want to type like, immediately go away. Thaat's annoying. There are many things I want to say. Many things I want to express. But then when I'm already here, they just disappear. Okay, think.

Right. it's impossible. You can't. And you can't. There's no way. No matter how much I noticed, no matter how many times you look at me, there's. No. Way. So, Aqilah. Tell yourself as many times as you can, and say, "Stop.". Just tune out of those thoughts. Just ignore. Notice? Then ignore. There's no way you like me. C'mooon. I'm 'different' than you. You can't possibly like a girl like me right?

Well, gotta go. Later! ;)

P.S Happy Belated 18th Birthday to Nadiah and Happy 18th Birthday to Adleen! :D

2010-04-20T17:25:00.002+08:00

I felt down, really down. I feel sad. I miss my friends. I miss Secondary school life. I miss everything of it. I feel like I'm stranded on a foreign island, which is far, far away. I don't know anybody here. All the unfamiliar faces, but I did saw a couple of familiar faces. But not that much. It's like there are so few of ex-West Spring students here. I don't feel assured. Teary eyes, the sad face. :( I don't feel at home. West Spring was my second home. My happy home, with a crazy and brilliant family there. It is still, actually. I have really nice friends, and they are friendly. Haha. But will I get used to the new everything? And I miss my lil brother. It's the family I feel relaxed. So sad.. That's what I'm feeling. :(

Friends Forever.wmv

2010-04-15T11:00:00.002+08:00

Morning, y'll! Here's a video I made and it's dedicated to my five girlfriends. I hope they like it. Well, enjoy!

P.S By register no. ;D

2010-03-29T16:28:00.003+08:00

The Sentosa video.

2010-03-24T12:41:00.003+08:00

My Playlist

2010-03-23T17:14:00.005+08:00

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

10022010(002).mp4

2010-03-23T16:13:00.003+08:00

Amira, Fatin, Su and me at Vivo

2010-03-23T16:13:00.001+08:00

Me and Fatin at Vivo, taking pics

2010-03-23T16:12:00.001+08:00

Me and Fatin at Vivo

2010-03-23T16:11:00.001+08:00

2010-03-18T11:22:00.004+08:00

Morning! 5B's class outing at Sentosa on Tuesday, 16/03/10 was great! Almost all turned up, except maybe those who worked or couldn't make it. But all in all, it was fun and always great to see the rest after, what, about two months? I really hope there will be another class outing again. And at least, everyone will turn up when there is. Insyallah, amin. So, today, I've posted some videos taken at Vivo. I'll post the one at Sentosa some other time. Well, hopefully there won't be any error when it comes to watching them. Enjoy!

2010-03-17T15:47:00.003+08:00

I've gotta say this. You've been camouflaging yourself, why are you appearing now? I'm frustrated, and really, I mean that. I've never thought this would come. I don't expect it. Why, then, is that feeling there? Why is it suddenly there? It's so strong, this is something different. Is this a trick of my mind? No, I've felt something, something related to this before. Why? What are you thinking? Are you coming closer? I dunno if I should come closer. To come closer or not is what frustrates me. I'm not sure if this is the right thing to do. If we end up together for life, that would be great, I guess. But wait. Rewind. I've always get the feeling that you find me.. somewhat interesting. Up till now, I'm unable to anaylse it really correctly. I don't find that you like me, so far I can tell. But then, just... it is more than that. There's a feeling there, a greeaat feeling, telling me I can't let it unnoticed. Not great as in good kind of great. Are you trying to tell me something? Don't make me frustrated, please. For one thing, I don't want to like you if I don't stand a chance. But if all of this is happening.. It's making me frustrated! No. We'll be going our own ways. Even if we might be in the same school, or maybe no, we won't be like that kind of close anymore. Maybe we won't even talk to each other. Maybe just smiles. You'll have your own friends and I'll have mine. Maybe you'll meet a great girl in your new school. You will. So, even if I like you, there's no chance. We'll just go our own ways, won't we. Even when I saw you after months, I was like, wow. But you know.. So yeah. So the conclusion is, I'm staying here where I am, and moving on like I'm scheduled to.

2010-03-05T14:06:00.002+08:00

Hello! Today's my birthday! Happy Birthday to me! Haha.

Happy Birthday to me,
Happy Birthday to me,
Happy Birthday to Aqilah,
Happy Birthday to me!

Well, I'm 18! Can't believe this. I'm finally 18. Not in a way that I'm excited, but just can't believe you know. Anyway, of course, thanks to everyone who wished me a Happy Birthday through sms or FB! I was sleeping and was awaken a few times by the messages from people, and I knew they were from my friends wishing me a Happy Birthday. Well, I ignored them, and finally read them when I woke up at 6 plus for my Subuh prayers. I got four messages. Haha. Some wished a few minutes after midnight, and one, waay past midnight. Haha. Okay, so I guess I'm still receiving wishes. I hope I will have a wonderful day today, have a great day! I wonder when I will get my presents, haha. It's quite wierd, not to receive any presents yet when you've received wishes (from the people who usually give you presents). Well, thanks again! I really appreciate it! :D

I wonder how my birthday cake will taste like. Hm.. Haha. I know it'll be delicious. Anyway, I'm going out later, meeting my mum's superior and her nurse friend at Somerset MRT at 6.30pm. That is faar. Can't we meet somewhere nearer? I mean, we are meeting at night! I wanna celebrate with my lil bro and aunt, eat my cake. You know, having that wonderful feeling and knowing today is your birthday, and chilling at home. Feeling quite special. Haha. Okay, well, the purpose of meeting is to get to know more about nursing. I mean, who knows, I may just accept the course. God.. I wonder to accept it or not! I mean, if I go to NP, I can join the CCAs which I've been looking forward to. If I go to private school, no CCas, which means I'm likely to gain weight! Oh my gosh. This is really a headache.

Oh yeah, watched Alice In Wonderland in 3D with DBFF, Fatin at Marina Square yesterday! She paid the ticket for me. I mean, as I don't have money for that, so she decided to give me a treat seeing it is my birthday today. Thanks, girlfriend! Really, thanks! :) So, the movie was great. And the Mat Hatter is iiiss mad. Haha. Well, that's for today. Later!

P.S Happy Birthday, Aqilah!! :)

2010-03-03T14:35:00.002+08:00

If I have a boyfriend, I'll treat him good. I'll be there for him with a shoulder to cry on. I won't expect him to pay for lunch or dinner for me even if it's our first date. I don't see why he should. If it's because he's trying to be a gentleman, or he thinks guys should be doing that, nope, sorry. I don't think that way. I'll be happy to pay for my own food, like I've always done, thanks. I'll expect him to treat me just he's treated me like a friend, before. Of course, we would have to be friends first, friends for sometime and not just a two-day friend. I'll choose a good boyfriend, whom I can see that he's a good guy. I won't choose him just because I feel there's no other option, or because I feel lonely and only he is there for me. Nope. I'll choose him because I like him, and that he's a great guy. I'll go after him even if he doesn't feel the same way. I'll wait. But I'll bear in mind, if I've waited long, it's not wise to like someone if he doesn't like you back. I'll choose him who I can connect with easily, who I can talk to as if I've known him for so long. That'll be the guy. He'll have to attract my attention, be the one who stands out from the crowd in my eyes. I don't like a guy for fun. I don't like him because I'm just still a kid which may lead to a break up soon. I'll be the good girlfriend as well.

Anyway, this Friday is my birthday! I'll be turning 18 really soon. Well, hope I'll have a great birthday this year! :D :D

2010-02-23T13:43:00.002+08:00

Candids and funny photos (Part 2):

Creepy much?

Not tht creepy.

And to finish off this post, a cartoonic pic of me in NLB. This cracks me up. Haha.

Later!

2010-02-12T13:14:00.002+08:00

Hello! I've just seen the photos we took at Vivo two days ago, and that reminds me, here are some videos I took of us. This are the links:

Fatin and me at Vivo:
1. http://www.youtube.com/watch_private?v=HYGgqaHzsH0&sharing_token=ko1KVZK1JSv-9Xd06tHEDA
2. http://www.youtube.com/watch_private?v=Qt0zXPrtCyA&sharing_token=TlJEhpOHWRu8-eFzsZs7Tg

Me and the rest:
1. http://www.youtube.com/watch_private?v=uDLkqIj_pDI&sharing_token=NGnvqgaOQgmNiwgh0o7llw
2. http://www.youtube.com/watch_private?v=XfBeCG4dODA&sharing_token=zJQqzS2OZlxyPn8eKgkmng

Honestly, the videos I took two days ago, they are boring videos, so I thought any of the girls want to watch it, well you can now. Gotta go, gonna have lunch and watch Hook on HBO! Later!

2010-02-09T15:10:00.005+08:00

I've made some small changes to my playlist, and boy, was level 18 of Park Dash hard. Anyway, it's time to move on to friends. Here are the candids and funny photos of me and my friends back in 2008 and 2009 (Part 1):

Like, seriously, that was soo not funny. But thinking back, it was quite! Haha.

Freeze! Lol.

Tk blh semangat lagi seh. Hahaha.

Haha. Boo ya!

She always talk so animatedly. Haha.

Twix! :D

Hm. Me: Yay, me! Haha.

The Three: Making the big entrance. Lol.

Ballerina aka sunshine. Haha. :D

Me and Amira feat. the Extras. Lol.

So that's it. By the way, love the Korean songs, and the videos that come with them! I hope tomorrow will be on. I mean, we've planned to catch a movie, My Ex today actually, but it's postponed to tomorrow. Well, can't wait, cause I mean, hello.. hanging out with friends? Alright, hope tomorrow will be a brilliant day. Later!

My Playlist

2010-02-09T12:58:00.000+08:00

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

2010-02-05T15:21:00.002+08:00

My appeal was unsuccessful. I feel like crying. Urgh..! I really want the Biotech course in RP, why can't you just accept me huh?? Urgh.. I really don't want the nursing course, I don't want a career in nursing, I don't want to become a nurse.. What was I THINKING to even put that nursing course for one of my choices? URGH. This is the end of the world.. I've no where to go.. Okay, can we cut that?

Urrrggghh.. I should have checked the courses from RP as well before submitting my choices.. This is me, when there are no adults around to help.. I really regret.. Can a miracle happen for me, at least this once? Yes, NP is nearer, it's a good school. But I seriously am not happy and okay with the nursing course! It's much better if I get the Biotech course from RP although the school is still growing and it's further from home! Urrgh.. Someone pleeasse advise me what to doo.

2010-02-01T14:13:00.003+08:00

Finally. No virus, no stuff like that.

Afternoon! On the 27 of January which was last Wednesday, we got our posting results. Which school and course you are posted to. Well, when I saw the number and "MOE: AQILAH BTE ZAKARIA" which I received like 6am in the morning, around there, I paused, and took a deep breath. When I opened it, guess what, I got nursing! Oh my gosh. I was posted to Ngee Ann Poly, but I don't like that I got that course! Nursing is quite interesting, but I don't want nursing as a career. Finally, I made up my mind, and on the 29th, after reaching home from BP, I quickly logged on to the net and search for courses from RP, NP and SP that have COP above mine. I concluded that I rather go to RP with a course I'm okay with than go to NP with a course I'm not okay with. So, at 3 plus, I put down Diploma in Biotechnology for my first choice and Diploma in Technology and Arts Management as my second choice. I really hope I'll get my first choice. If I get Biotech., I can choose to specialise in Food and Nutrition in my 3rd year, and then enter straight into the 3rd of the four years in Monash University in Melbourne, Australia. In Uni, I can pursue a degree in Dietics and Nutrition or something like that. After graduating from Uni, I then can become a dietician. Cool, isn't it? I found out it's much easier entering Uni like that. So Biotech is okay for me, and being a dietician is too. Results of my appeal will be out on 5 February, 2pm onwards. Insyallah I'll get Biotech. Amin. But I know, Biotech will be hard and challenging. So I must be ready for it.

Okay, pics of the day. Me (2007/2008):

Laughing

When are we gonna cycle again? When, when?

Make-up and hair done by friends. Nice!

No, the pole-like thingy, which is a tree is not my friend. Lol

Wish I could ride on one of the reindeers. :)

Till then. Later!

2010-01-22T15:50:00.005+08:00

Remember that time when I went to Kelantan with my bro for about three weeks the last two months? I'll be posting some photos during our stay there.

We went to to Thailand as well! At its checkpoint. Behind is the ferry for vehicles.

Lambs, or are they sheeps? Not one, but more of them go, "Baaah, baah..". Lol. They reminded me of the sheeps from Animal Farm. Hahaha.

At Thailand checkpoint. That's Malaysia.

My friends have never seen my dad. So here's, my dad at a stall.

My grandma, and one of my cousin's children.

Baby! Me and another of my cousins daughter.

So cute right? She seemed scared of the camera though. Haha.

This is not an ordinary pic but a drawing drawn by my dad during his youth. Very real, huh?

Another cousin's son.

My dad's kampong.

So there you go. I will continue to post pictures. Maybe it'll be candids? Naah. Well, we'll see. Later!

2010-01-21T14:57:00.008+08:00

And of course, family pics of the day (funny moments).

Right, you think that mannequin would smile, though?

Woo.. Ookaaay.

That is soo not funny, lil bro! Lol

Any pic taken together, one would always be a biit left out

Yeeaah. Not funny! Haha

2nd day of Raya, another case of people being left out

Of course, picture soo not perfect

Trying to be alienish, perhaps?

So of course, there were many photos taken together with one or more left out from the pic. But finally, we managed to take a nice pic with everyone in.

xoxo

Aqilah

3.19pm

My Playlist

2010-01-21T14:51:00.005+08:00

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

2010-01-21T14:25:00.001+08:00

Untitled

I open my eyes
I try to see but I’m blinded by the white light
I can’t remember how
I can’t remember why
I’m lying here tonight

And I can’t stand the pain
And I can’t make it go away
No I can’t stand the pain

How could this happen to me
I made my mistakes
I’ve got no where to run
The night goes on
As I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

Everybody’s screaming
I try to make a sound but no one hears me
I’m slipping off the edge
I’m hanging by a thread
I wanna start this over again

So I try to hold onto a time when nothing mattered
And I can’t explain what happened
And I can’t erase the things that I’ve done
No I can’t

2010-01-21T14:09:00.002+08:00

If I'd cried, it would be enough to fill a whole bucket meant to collect water at the well. They don't get it. They will never. Things he do wrong, he would get an earful. But more than that. Inside me, I am hurting so much. I don't need to be. But yet I still do. It affects me and I'm so scared it will affect my studies as well. That's why, I struggled so much. I cry because of a few things. I just want the other half of my life back. Once in my room, before turning in, I'd cry to let it all out. My life, is sometimes so sad. I don't wanna be the one to say, 'the feelings inside are too heavy for me to carry'. No, I don't wanna say. I can say I hate some points in my life. When I don't hate, I'll accept all that I can, all that little time having fun, before the feeling becomes gone. Sometimes, after hanging out with friends, I'd feel so low and feel that the warm glow in me has vanished. I always thought to myself. All I want is to live with my parents, or at least with one of them and to have a complete happy family. I am so pathetic.

2010-01-18T11:28:00.003+08:00

Photos of Hari Raya taken in 2009:

First day..

Days later..

Later!

11.39am

2010-01-15T16:54:00.003+08:00

Seeing him that day for the first time in weeks made me glad. I've been dying to see him. I missed him. Sometimes, when he's around with my friends, that kinda push me away. Not as in he or my friends meant to do that, but I will tend to walk off first. During the last time, I felt exactly like that, and I felt kinda left out you see. It's though he was doing that on purpose. I'd like to talk to him, yes I do, but things weren't that way. I would feel a bit jealous and awkward, which is waaay awkward. I feel so funny. It makes me wish that I wasn't there, but at the same I would liike to be there.

In the hall, we didn't speak to each other. In fact, we didn't throughout the whole time while we were in school before going home. I didn't even realise it was his turn to take his results until I looked up and he had just walked past, results already in his hands. I really wish I had talk to him, because it may be the last time I see him. For now, I think that this is our fate. I didn't tell him I like him. He's got nooo idea that I do. We are going our separate ways now. Maybe I won't be seeing him again until some time later when all of us will be meeting our ex-classmates. I'll accept as the way it is. For me, liking him is like daydreaming, except it looks a bit real. He's The One, realising only when exams were near. He's cool. I still like him. But as time goes on, I'll try to forget him. I will move on only when I've forgotten about him. Take care.

5.08pm

2010-01-15T16:20:00.003+08:00

Afternoon everyone. This is my first post of the month. Happy New Year everyone! Hope 2010 will a great and better year for everyone. Insyallah.

I've submitted my choices of course just now at the library at 11 plus. My first choice is Arts Business Management, and I really hope I'll get posted to that course. Insyallah. Well, for O levels, I passed! Okay, my results were just satisfying reults. Here are the reults:

B4 for EL
C6 for Maths
C5 for Combined Sc
C5 for Combined Humans
C6 for POA
B4 for F&N
B3 for Malay

So as you can see, I only got Bs and Cs. Surprisingly, Malay is my most best subject. Honestly, Malay is one of my weakest subject. Yeah. Haha. It's just hard work and much effort that I got a B3 for my Malay and merit for its oral. Well done, Aqilah. About the O level results, I could have done better, I know that, but I guess I'm okay with it. You know how difficult it is sometimes for me to concentrate on my schoolwork. I was struggling, like the rest of you guys. I did badly for Common Test 1, mid-year exams, and even Prelim. My points were always near or above 30. When I got my results, I opened the Form A with trembling hands (and of course in my heart, I was like, can I even open it now?? Oh, who cares. Lets open it!), with curiousity to how many points I got. When I had finally opened it, I gasped. I got 22 points. I already started to feel disappointed, when Fatin took a look at the Form A, and told me I have a lot of courses to choose from. I looked at the codes, and was like, oh yeah! I started to feel better.

But actually, after that, I still felt a bit disappointed. I had hope to get below 14 points. But no worries. Really soon after, I felt better 'cause I have actually done okay. I had passed all subjects, and got 22 points didn't I? At least there are many courses I'm eligible for, despite some of the low cut-off-points(COP). Okay. So congratulations, Aqilah. You can proceed to Poly!

To anyone who feels disappointed about their results, don't be. Do better in your studies. This is just a lesson we've learnt. Jiayou!

4.43pm

2009-12-19T20:56:00.002+08:00

Hey! Tomorrow, my bro and I will be spending a few nights in my aunt's house in Johore Bahru. We'll go back to Singapore on Wednesday. Well I'm glad my aunt's dropping us, or not we'll have to take the public bus. Which is, no comments. Well, hope we'll have fun there. Never spend nights there before. Okay, later!

xoxo

2009-12-13T11:06:00.002+08:00

Morning! I'm back! Reached Singapore at 9 or 10 plus. Reached Larkin at 8 or a few minutes after that. Wow, I even had stomach trouble. Gosh, how dare it tortured me during that period. Finally reached home at 11 or 11 plus in the morning. Alhamdullilah, reached home safely, and my dad has reached his home safely. Just now, we chatted on Yahoo! messenger, and used the video call. I have a webcam you guys! My dad bought it for us so that we could chat and see each other on the messenger. Cool.

So, went shopping in Kelantan, and bought some ole-oles for two of my aunts. Bought kain sutera or something like that for my aunt who I am currently staying with and tudung for my aunt also known as my legal guardian. And, we even went to Thailand! Not much difference between Kelantan and Thailand. The Malays in Thailand look like Malaysians. Sometimes I can't even tell whether they are Malaysians or not, as some of them do visit Thailand as well. The troublesome part when entering and leaving Thailand is, you have to queue to have your passport chopped. And the queues were long! And you have to take a boat or ferry (for vechicles as well) to get to Thailand, unlike getting to JB from Singapore. I'm so glad there's a bridge between here and there.

Anyway, I will post some pictures while we were in Kelantan, and start my storytelling another time, perhaps the next time I'm online. If you ask me, I think that it's okay, not say I enjoyed myself very much, not say I didn't enjoy myself, but it was okay on the whole, during my stay in Kelantan.

Okay, signing off.

Later!

2009-12-10T22:40:00.002+08:00

I know there is someone, who is on the same path as me. I feel a bit relieved. It's not something to be glad about though. It's something to be sad about. I dunno if they are in a better situation. Maybe they are. At least they are not moving anywhere. At least other things are about the same. Whereas me, no, it's not like that. Maybe we are in a worst situation. We are feeling worst. The difference is that, and because of that, a few things were added as well. But no matter, at least there is someone like me. At least they got to understand what it feels like. At least they know how I feel, and I know how they feel. But wait, one of them is so much younger than me, and the other is probably younger as well. That must be tougher for them, to face something like that at a very young age. Okay, maybe, we are at about the same situation. Okay, that's fair. But still, I pity them, as people would pity me.

10.48pm

2009-12-10T20:44:00.004+08:00

Oh my gosh, Gu Jun Pyo with straighten hair, is so... wow. I was like, wah.. When you're used to a person with curly hair, and then suddenly they have straighten hair, sometimes to us, it's like, they look better. Don't you think? Oh my gosh, he was so cool.. With the uniform and the lollipop.. I hope I won't get gaga over him.

8.44pm

2009-12-09T18:44:00.002+08:00

I'll be going back on Friday night and will be reaching Singapore on Saturday morning. Uuu.. Bubble tea! I'm so looking forward to drinking bubble tea! I miss it so muucch! Right now, while typing, while having nothing to do, I'm waiting for Korean Boys Over Flowers Episode three part 2 of 7 to load. This Korean drama is one of my most favourite TV shows. And it's the most recent one! I can't get enough of it. It's way too romantic, funny, and enjoyable to watch! Love Gu Jun Pyo. The romance between the main characters in this story, is sweet. Wow. Wish mine will be like theirs.

2009-12-09T01:24:00.002+08:00

You know, it doesn't matter whether you're single. It's okay to be. You don't need to be influence by friends to be attached. To desperately find your other half although he's not the one. Just let things go their way, let nature take its course. If you've found him, then congrats. If not, then continue your life like it is everyday. Don't have to rush. When you've found him, you'll be truly glad. :)

2009-12-07T23:56:00.002+08:00

Listen here bud. Don't be so rebellious cause I'm gonna kick your butt sooner or later if you ever do that again. Don't tell me these and that and blame everyone else. Why don't you just step back, and see your own mistakes, what you've done instead? You're 14, and you're not gonna win. Alright? I realised that you, being here, only make yourself look worst. You're better off at home, no matter what you say, no matter how very much you dislike being there. Cause, you, you don't know the real meaning of being disciplined, and you need to get your butt down there and learn the true meaning of being disciplined, of showing respect towards others. I know what situation you're in but please don't give me those as your excuse. You're nothing but a coward. Be like a true man and face your fears! I'm much more braver and matured than you and it's time for you to grow up, and don't act like an eight year old spoilt brat! Because that's getting you nowhere. And that's partly the reason the situation you're in.

2009-12-07T16:10:00.003+08:00

And before I forget, I would like to wish my dearest cousin, aka Girl Girl, a Happy 14th Birthday! May your wishes be granted on this beautiful day. Happy Birthday!

2009-12-07T15:55:00.002+08:00

Afternoon everyone! Lets go ice-skating shall we? Yes, yes? It's been years since I last ice-skated. Anyway..

Here are 7 things I like about him:
1) He makes me smile
2) His sense of security
3) His hair
4) His own sense of humour though it's not meant to be funny
5) Comfort he provides
6)Trust he provides
7) His 'determination'

Okay, that's all! Haha.

2009-12-06T23:33:00.004+08:00

Hey! I'm still in Kelantan. Will be back in Singapore either on Friday or Saturday. Gosh, I'll miss this place! I know that, before coming here, it will be hard for me to leave Singapore, but once I've spent nights here, it will be hard for me to leave Kelantan instead. Staying here keeps me kinda grounded. Like, discourage me from getting things getting into my head. Well, when I'm back in Singapore, I'll be looking forward to hanging out with my friends and lil brother! Go catch movies (New Moon, A Christmas Carol, The Princess and the Frog Prince and so on), cycling, watch Momo Love (oh, been missing the episodes), and do other bunch of great stuff I've been having in mind!

I'll be going offline in a few minutes. Well, good night everyone. And my Korean name's Iseul! Hahaha.

xoxo

2009-12-04T14:27:00.002+08:00

It's so hard, wait, no. It's so reluctant to accept, that one of your friends have migrated to another country. I've already one friend who's migrated to Adelaide, Australia early this year. And now I've just found out that one of my former Primary School classmates has just migrated to the USA two weeks ago. Sigh.. I feel that something that has always been near, is now so far. It feels different. He was born in Hong Kong but later moved to Singapore. He's a really nice person, and I think he's the most nicest guy I've ever met. I just hoped that he will be able to get used to the surroundings there and have a good life there..

2009-11-27T15:31:00.003+08:00

Why do my father think that way? WHY does he think I don't like him? For god's sake, I love him. I love my dad like every girl loves hers. I'm tired of having to explain it to him. Why do I look so glum, unhappy? Why? Here's why. I don't like being in this dusty room. I don't like seeing my things placed on the dusty floor. I love my things as I love myself. I'm okay with having to stay in a kampung. But I have to admit, sometimes, things here, I can't get used to. I've lived in modern Singapore for 16 years. How do you expect me to get accustomed to the place here? Oh my gosh. And not only that. I miss my friends, I miss my homeland, my home. I'm feeling kinda home sick. Waay home sick. The last thing is, dad, stop showing favouritism! Stop showing too much concern towards me, stop caring too much over me. What about lil bro? He even said something that made him think my father likes me more. C'mon. I support equalism. Give us equal care and concern. I hate the fact that my dad, is showing favouritism. That made me feel worst. I look glumer. I cannot tell him this. It'll probably hurt him. And, I wish I wouldn't see my dad's red eyes anymore. It makes me glumer. I just want my dad to be himself. Move on. See the broken bridge, get over it. Don't live in the past. Just be normal, happy, as if nothing had happened. And later, people will accuse me of not caring for my dad because of my actions towards him. C'mon, give me a break. I've never hated him. I've loved him before I could speak! I'll disappoint my mum greatly if I don't.

2009-11-22T20:04:00.003+08:00

Hey! I'm now in Kelantan. I'm using my dad's laptop. We reached here in the morning at 8 plus. 12 hours journey. Slept, and woke up every hour. And you know, it was really cold during our stop at one of the places. It ws raining, and windy! I was shivering crazily! My jacket was in the bag, so. But I think I would still feel very cold. And here are some photos I took just a while ago..

Anyways, I'm still trying to get used to the surroundings here. It's so diiferent from the green and lion city Singapore. The people here speak Malay differently, it's kampung here, and it's not what you see so much in Singapore over here. Of course. Today is our first day, and I hope I can survive for the next one week and a day here. And my bro and I will also be celebrating Hari Raya Haji here (gulps). Right. Okay, can't spend too much time here, my bro wann use the laptop soon.

Later!

P.s Can't wait to go to back to Singapore!

xoxo

2009-11-19T15:31:00.004+08:00

I was tagged by bestie to do this, quiz? Alright.

1. List down 5 hot guys you would like to go out on a date with.
-Rupert Grint
-Daniel Radcliffe
-Liam Aiken
-Justin Bieber
-Lucas Till

2. List down 5 gorgeous girls you would like to be BFFs with.
-Emma Watson
-Emma Roberts
-Demi Lovato
-Ashley Tisdale
-Taylor Swift

3. List down 5 bands that rock out your world with their songs.
-The Jonas Brothers
-SS501
-Simple Plan
-Linkin Park
-Boys Like Girls

4. List down 5 awesome movies that you had watched in the cinema.
-Harry Potter!
-Stardust
-Night At the Museum
-Twilight
-A movie feat. Adam Sandler, which was shown last Dec. Forgot the title!

5. List down 5 things that you will never ever do in your life.
-Do the wrong things I shouldn't be doing
-Abandon my friends
-Show disrespect towards the elders (but sometimes I kind of do)
-Give up on my lil bro
-Give up in life!

6. List down 5 of your habits that you are used to till today.
-Be a morning person
-Being clumsy. (I can't help it!)
-Spend too much time looking in the mirror
-Talk loudly only to realise it later
-Watch Chinese/Korean dramas

7. List down 5 things that you can't live without in life.
-My family
-My friends
-Love
-Dreams
-Peace!

8. List down 5 things that you wish to do in life before you turned 25 years old.
-Get an O level certificate
-Get a diploma (at least a diploma, if I don't enter University)
-Live on my own
-Be totally independent (at least after I'm 21. I would be an adult!)
-Ensure my bro finish his education (if it's till ITE, then so be it.), get through NS and get a stable job, one he enjoys

9. List down 5 things that had never happened to your life before.
-Experience natural disasters (Alhamdullilah)
-Get seriously ill (Alhamdullilah)
-Be a rich kid (oh, it doesn't matter)
-A happily ever after (like in Cinderealla stories, haha)
-Going to a magical place, nowhere like it. (yeah, seriously nowhere like it)

10. List down 5 amazing gifts you wish to recieve.
-A happy life, content with everything despite some obstacles
-Being able to see paradise ( for eg. visit a place like Neverland)
-A happy family
-Great bunch of friends
-And an amazing husband (can we have a 6th?)
-To see a peaceful world with no wars whatsoever

11. List down 5 countries you wish to pay a visit.
-London! (oh, my favourite!)
-France
-New York
-Australia
-S. Korea

12. Tag down 5 friends to do this quiz.
-Nadiah
-Hanisah
-Aisha
-Hafiz (Nad's lil bro)
-Minglin
(Actually, I dunno who to tag!)

Annd I'm done! That took me some time to think. Lol.

2009-11-16T13:04:00.003+08:00

Afternoon everyone! Oh my gosh, I've just experienced my worst nightmare. Yesterday after reaching home from Jurong Point, I had a massive headache and gastric pain. I really wanted to go home and just rest. Okay, I slept, and woke up at 12 plus in the morning. Good thing my stomach was okay, but my headache was still there and worst, I really felt nauseous. It was torture to feel so nauseous, and nothing was coming out when you want to. I just cried helplessly, when everyone was sleeping. Finally, I took something and put into my mouth so that I would vomit. But nothing came out either. I did that a few times, and nothing came out. I even felt like a sour taste in my throat, as if the vomit wanted to come out. I didn't know what to do, so I sat on the sofa, laid my head, and tried to sleep. Fortunately, I was able to fall asleep! But a few minutes later, I woke up. I still felt a bit nauseous, and went to bed when I felt that it was safe enough for me to. I even had a few plastic bags beside my pillow, just in case I feel like vomitting halfway sleeping.

Even when I woke up at 7 plus in the morning, my headache was still there. But I didn't feel as nauseous. Right now as I'm typing, I'm having a headache and I feel nauseous. Omg. What is happening to me? Before I left the house, yeah, I had a slight headache, and I was okay, no gastric, whatsoever. But around 7 or 8 plus at night, my headache became worst and suddenly I was having gastric. And that was the time when I was having dinner, at KFC. I'm typing down just to express my feelings. I was so helpless just now, I felt like I could faint. And I thought all about going to the doctor and all.

During sleeping, I suddenly dreamt about some of my classmates. Even the guy I like was in it. We were kind of auditioning for some singing competition, and I was wondering which song to sing. Suddenly I dreamt about my classmates?

I think I'll go to the doctor soon if this persist, if I'm still not feeling better. Perhaps tomorrow or Wed. I hope I'll be fine. Please, go away. I'll eat something full for lunch later. Maybe something is wrong with my stomach.

2009-11-12T10:37:00.004+08:00

Hey!! Morning guys, I'm here to update my dusted blog, and we should be glas that the O leve exams are over right? Okay! First up are some photos we took during our jalan raya.

Alright, I'm gonna add some songs. Anyway, I've just signed up at Facebook, and I was like, omg, where do I go? and all that. Haha. Yesterday, some friends and I went to watch Jennifer's Body after the Phy/Bio P1. Omg, it was simply horrifying to watch. and I realised that a few minutes into the movie. The girl, Jennifer, as known as the demon, eats boys. She's crazy! But we can't totally blame her. As Fatin said in her blog, it was bloody. Yeah. I'm not gonna watch it again.

This Friday, bestie and I will be going to Geylang, Penin and Bugis. Gonna buy some things at the first two locations. Bestie wants to something at Geylang and Bugis. Well, hope I get the things I have in mind. From 21st to 30 of Nov, I'll be going to Malaysia with my bro. Gonna cry, I can't help thinking about the 1 week and 2 days there. It's too long. Okay, I will end here.

Later!

xxx

2009-10-10T09:16:00.002+08:00

Morning! This will be my last post for this month and I won't be posting or go blogging until O levels are over. I'm freaking out. Urrgh. Well wish me luck. Insyallah, I will be able to do them and pass with good points. Alright, take care everyone. Signing off.

xoxo

2009-09-07T18:23:00.002+08:00

나가 당신의 뒤를 얻을 수 없는 경우에, 나는 여전히 상관없이 위에 움직일 것이다. 당신이 저를 볼 때, 그것은 당신이 저를 묵살하더라도 이었다. 이것은 연애소설이다. 당신이 저를 받아들일 수 있었다, 나가 알고 있을 때, 그것에는 있다 감각이 알고, 알아내기 위하여 당신 종류의 아닙니다 낙상한다. 나는 여기에서 있다. 저를 밀어제치지 않거든, 또는 나가 여기에서 있지 않는다 처럼 행동하는 것을 시도하지 말라. 나는 그로 찬미자가 그 있어서 몇 개 일지라도 그를, 나 위에 움직였다, 나 이지 않는다 더 이상 잊었었다. 나는 당신을 좋아한다. 당신은 저에게 안전의 감각을 준다. 나가 당신 일 때, 느낌이 당신에 의하여 저에게 안전한 시킨다. 나는 저것을 좋아한다. 게다가, 나는 당신 나가 수년간 당신을 알고 있었다 처럼 말해서 좋다. 같이 저희 사이 아무 방벽도 없다. 나는 당신이 누구를 위해인지 당신을 좋아한다. FYI, 깊은 곳에서 아래로, 당신을 위해 비축된 장소가 있다.

2009-09-07T18:23:00.001+08:00

2009-07-31T13:51:00.002+08:00

My condolensces to him. I didn't know that Joshua Ang (I Not Stupid, I Not Stupid Too) recently lost his mum until I read an article on Yahoo!. Like me, he was really saddened by the news, and asked himself why. I know how he feels. It must have been terrible for him, as it was for me about one year ago. No matter what, be strong and move on. That is what your mum would want you to do, I'm sure.

2009-07-26T17:55:00.000+08:00

2009-07-26T17:30:00.003+08:00

I'm almost into accepting you. Sometimes, the other nudged me, and I'm reminded of why I could possibly like him. And then I pause. But for now, I think I'm accepting you.

You stood beside me, I thought my heartbeat could stopped.
You looked at me as I played, I thought I couldn't hit it back.

If I like you, would you make me smile?

If one day, I've already accepted you, would you suddenly say no?
If that happens, I'll tell myself it's okay. You've waited long.

At the moment, I'll wait for myself to tell you.

xoxo

Urrgh

2009-07-26T17:21:00.002+08:00

I'm feeling way frustrated right now. I want to do my hw, seated at the desk, and then just after finishing Bio, I'm kind of, done. I'm frustrated! I can't concentrated on finishing my hw. In my mind, it was already like, I will finish all of my hw by today (actually it was supposed to be yesterday). But, look. Urrgh. I feel like I need to do something. I can't sit and do my hw all the time. I need to do something fun. That's why sometimes I have the urge to go out and just play. This house is too small. I feel limited. Urrgh. I think my study and play time isn't balanced. That's why I like PE. Urrgh.

2009-07-17T18:20:00.001+08:00

And of course, Happy 17th Birthday, Aisha! Hope you like the presents!

2009-07-17T17:29:00.002+08:00

Sometimes the whole situation makes me indecisive. I like you, but I like you too. I don't mean to say that I like someone, that I've reserved him a place. I don't like anyone. But I can feel the chemistry between you and me. I think you're okay. You're funny, very sociable. But I don't know which is fact, which is fictious. You're making me indecisive. I can like you you know. But I'm taking precautions, I hate getting heartbroken. It's healed right now, and I don't want it to be broken again. People said you've got a girlfriend. I wonder if that's true. But sometimes you stare at me when I'm not looking. What does that mean, what do you mean? C'mon man, don't make me more confused. You're one case, but for another, is another. He's cool. I can relate to him and I feel comfortable when I'm talking to him, as if we've known each for years. Of course, we do know each other for years. For four years in fact. I started to consider since that day. I stood right behind you, it was totally packed. Listening to my MP3, I glanced at your back once in awhile. Omg. I felt like I could hug you. I tried to stop that feeling. What'd gotten into me. I've never thought of it that way. But still, you have left me something I didn't thought you would. I've been thinking about it. You're okay, when I talk to you, there's a connection it's hard to explain. But I feel comfortable. Although you're really focused on studies, I can tell you've got your own kind of cool. You're not a geek. Maybe you are, but not as a geek geek. If I like you, I'll feel way comfortable. But at the same time I want someone who can rock. Who is cool cool.

If I choose you, would I regret? If I choose you instead, would I be satisfied? I'm going with the flow for now. If you ask me, I dunno which to choose.

xoxo

P.S When you stared, I could melt right there and then.

2009-07-04T18:51:00.004+08:00

The carnival was great! It was successful, alhamdullilah. There were some artistes from Malay serial dramas such as Jeritan Sepi. They were on stage when we came. My friends were like, "Ah..!" and I was like, "Oh.". Haha. I don't watch Malay dramas, I don't even glance on the channel. We saw them, a group of them, on stage, receiving something, and taking a photo. They were young. In any case, people were everywhere, we played games, won some sweets, keropok and chocolates. I even bought three cups of Iced Milo with the coupon! It was honestly a little too irrestible. Hee! We even watch a few perfomances that were, kinda interesting. At least it was. Howveer, we missed the Guest-of-Honour's arrival and we didn't even see Fauzie Laily coming, when people said he would be! Anyway, here are some photos.

Five of us.

Suhana hard at work. =)

Me w Adleen.

Me w Fatin infront of the LRT.

Me w Suhana. Ignore the person in the background. That wasn't planned. =)

There are more photos but I decided to put some instead.

Well later!!!

P.S

This photo is funny! There were taking photos together, but I was the extra. And so it ended up like this. =)

P.S.S Harry Potter and The Sorcerer's Stone Part 1 and 2 premiering on Channel 5 tonight! Can't wait!

2009-07-03T10:06:00.003+08:00

Morning! Or bonjour! That's morning in French.

I'm in school, in IT lab 3, shivering because it's waay to cold for my body. It should be warm. Today is E-learning day for the seniors: Sec 4s and 5s. We have to print something for POA. I've no printer at home, so I came to school with bestie. Her computer at home has gone haywire. Okay, so printing. The only problem is that, the computer which is connected to the printer, can't or wouldn't open the file where the worksheets are stored! Great. That should be an interesting thing for us.

So, tomorrow, 4th July 2009, is the day. The BIG event of the year! It's going to be happening, if you're there! Cause tomorrow my school is having a carnival, called the Spring Carnival, which it has organised and planned since the very start of the year! Or was it last year? In any case, you haaavve got to be there! It will be fun! There are games, stalls selling a variety of foods and drinks. There is even a haunted house for you to explore! One ticket is worth $11, but you can buy it at $10! It's worth it! The carnival will be from 9 am to maybe about 2 pm. What time it'll end depends on the crowd. Well, my friends, some school mates, teachers and I will be there! It's just too fun and happening to miss! Bonus point, some celebrities will be there as well! So, just get up, get out and go play!

Okay, I have stop wasting my precious, preeciious time and focus on E-learning!

Alright, the short post will end here. Later dudes, dukettes!

P.S The Spring Carnival tomorrow will be happening, I'm sure! ;)

P.S.S Parts of the money from selling will go to helping the needy children.

2009-06-05T20:25:00.004+08:00

Hello! I'm planning to catch Hannah Montana The Movie tomorrow with a bestie at Bugis Junction. I can't wait! I mean, you can't count the days, weeks, months (okay, maybe I can for that) I haven't catch a movie! The last time was like, in December. And that was The City of Ember; watched it with Nadiah and Nisah at Bugis Junction. Haha. Actually, I'm being a bit dramatic here. It's been only 5 or 6 months, not 5 or 6 years! And I'm already like, freaking out. Freaking out? What.

Anyway, I missed going out with girlfriends, especially Fatin, like, I would usually go out with her most of the time. So I made sure I put aside some time, to go out with DBF. I mean, she's been like, complaining and all. (rolls eyes) Hahaha. So, I just bought a top from Vogue at Lot 1 a few days ago. No, was it last Friday? I can't remember. Anyway, the top seems nice. Maybe I'll wear it tomorrow. I dunno what my outfit will be tomorrow, so I'll try later. I can't wait to watch Hannah Montana The Movie. I've watched the trailer, and it's awesome! It seems like it's going to be a great movie. Fatin and I will meet at 11.30am, as we're catching the 12.45pm movie. After the movie, we'll be heading to Bussorah Street, near Bugis. She wants to buy something there. I still remember the first and last time we were there. We were kinda like tourists, walking here and there, looking for directions.

Well! I hope tomorrow will be a fun day! Insyallah. Amin.

Can't wait!

Later!

xoxo

2009-05-15T14:58:00.002+08:00

I can sigh a relief! Mid year exams are finally over! However, we have to go back to school on Monday. It was suppose to be an E-learning day for all, but they called us back at the last minute. This Monday, we have to be in school from 8am to 5pm. Can you imagine how long the hours are? How can I survive under these kind of conditions? Okay, stop that. Haha. Anyway, we'll be doing the same subject, I dunno about the rest, but for me, I'll be doing F&N the whole day. Are you crazy? But Mdm Selena will provide lunch for us. Well that's cool. I hope I can survive. And, I really hope I'll pass all of the papers and that my results will be better than my Common Test's results! Insyallah. Amin.

2009-05-10T20:26:00.003+08:00

Today is Mother's Day. If my mum was still here, I would have given her a hug. But now, I can't even give her a treat. I can't surprise her by paying for her shopping stuff, I can't give her a nice dinner. That's when I've started work. In any case, I would like to wish all mothers, including my mum, a Happy Mother's Day.

Songs #1

2009-05-08T18:15:00.001+08:00

www.Jango.com - Internet Radio

2009-04-15T21:13:00.001+08:00

Happy 19th Birthday, Emma! :-))

2009-03-17T10:14:00.002+08:00

Sweeney Todd is such a crazy man. Of course, portrayed by Johnny Depp. This man can just act in any character, literally.

Few months has passed, and it's already in the middle of March. So fast. And my last post was in early February. People come and go, probably disappointed that I haven't been updating. Or maybe just bored with me. Sorry, I try not to go online everyday, only when necessary.

I've been trying to find new skins to have a better look. I mean, this current skin, is like, so yesterday. However, I think I'll leave it here. Even though it's the holidays, I still have a ton of work to do. Especially my coursework. Urgg. I don't know what I was thinking when I opted for this subject. Regrets. Well, it's not totally disadvantagable. I learnt a lot of things regarding my body and health. I want to be a doctor when I grow up, don't I?

Anyway, this will probably be the first and last post for this month. I can't tell when my next post will be.

Gotta go. Will end here, and Happy Holidays!

xoxo

Aqilah

2009-02-07T20:19:00.001+08:00

If I have the chance, I will want to get out of this house, so called home. What the fish. I know I have my nice aunt, but is that enough? I can’t count how may times I’ve like, feel sad. Like normal, as if scheduled, my heart will feel heavy like as if it’s suddenly made up of metal. Maybe I’m exaggerating. As if it’s made up of rock. Heavier than my bag. Wow. A record. Never thought this could win. What am I saying. Gosh.. Stop it. They are gonna sent him somewhere. Well sent him. Just send him already. I’ve got to live up to it. Just care about myself, like it’s only me in this world. I’ll be happy. I’ve still got my friends, second to my mum. Or is it third? In any case, it’s in the top third. Urrgh. Stop lah. Go and talk somewhere, else. The TV’s on, even without anybody watching it. Not even me. Shut up, get it? Hah. How many times do I have to say it? If I say it out loud, it’s rude. Wait a minute. I am rude. Haha. I forgot. Almost forgot. Second paragraph of my research. Well, gonna stop here or what? I wish I’m much more disciplined. I know this will have a good ending, if it does not, I’ll just sigh. Idddiiioot. Don’t make my life like a living nightmare lah. Wanna scold, somewhere else. I’m busy here. This is why, sometimes, no, occasionally, I feel like staying some place else. I don’t mind if it’s not any of their houses. But that place will be the place where nobody knows me. Not even one. Sometimes it’s great without having anyone knowing you at all.

2009-02-06T21:16:00.002+08:00

My mind is in a whirl. Why do I still do this, even though I so much know what to do. For peak sake, Aqilah, wake up. What on earth are you doing? The exams are coming nearer and nearer and you don't know how fast time travels now adays. In fact, you actually do. I'm listening to Empty by The Click Five. Sometimes I feel the same way. Aqilah, stop it. Urrrgh. Seriously, I can't be any more disappointed with myself. You really wanna have a successful career don't you?? Then go on! Stop what you are doing this minute and go and open a book. Study! But why am I still sitting here? Urrrrgh. You are kidding yourself. Oh, yes you are. You wanna get into that course don't you? So get your butt out of that chair! I really mean it Aqilah. There's still time. You better get your homework done tomorrow. Or else.. And, make sure you continue with your coursework by tomorrow. I seriously mean it. Don't forget to revise, CONSTANTLY, and of course, relax at the same time too. Don't get yourself stressed up. Urrgh. Seriously, stop it!!

2009-02-06T19:54:00.002+08:00

Why when I like someone, that someone does not like me? I feel sad. Why do I have such a fate? When people like me, I hesitate. I think he's okay. From where and what I can see, he'll definitely make a nice boyfriend. A good boyfriend. He's got a cute haircut too. I'm having the feeling of jealousy already, and I realised how much this have progressed.

I've been looking for that someone. My Mr Right. I don't care which kind of guy, but he has to satisfy me. This guy, he's nice, funny, sociable. I never thought I might get this feeling towards him, cause I've been aiming at someone else, whom I've forgotten about. Let go.

If he's my boyfriend, I think I will appreciate him as much as I can, cause I kinda took granted of my last guy, and he's such a good boyfriend when I think back. How I regretted. Including accepting the break. Ergh. When I think of having this outcome everytime, I feel sien and I'll just sigh. It's time for my love story to start. Maybe he doesn't like me. I seriously wish for my imagination to end. Not all of them, only on that part. Actually, I'm giving a chance to him.

2009-01-12T20:54:00.004+08:00

Happy New Year everyone!

I'm doing my coursework, and have limited time for computer; surfing and stuff. It's been more than a week since Nadiah migrated.

Thanks for the pics you edited. It was nice, and the pic couldn't have been any better I suppose, with my hair all over?

xoxo

2008-12-31T10:29:00.002+08:00

Hello and morning!

Today's the last day of year 2008, and tomorrow the new year! Wow. How times flies, and I'll be turning 17 next year. In fact, all of us will a year older which we thought it's still a long way ahead of us. I will certainly miss 2008, like I do the years before. Well, lets take a glimpse of what 2008 has left behind for me.

On the first day of school, I felt fine, especially when most of my classmates were the same people as last year's. Then, around April, it was the band SYF, which our school got silver. Which is cool. Then later on the same month, I finally let go of him as I found out the truth, the real truth. Came May, which we had out Common Tests, and finally the mid-year holidays came. What a relief. Had some remedials, went somewhere with friends, bought some things, had lunch with mum at Swensens'(BPP) on the second last week of the holidays, and watched Hannah Montana and Miley Cyrus Best of Both Worlds' Concert in 3D, which aired for the first time on Disney Channel. Then, I didn't know that was the last time for me to have a meal outside with my mum, and the last time for me to eat Swensens' with her. That was also the last time she bought me things from The Body Shop. Six days later after HM and MC 3D concert was aired, my mum was admitted into the hospital. I was totally shaken by it, when she said she had head pains, and she looked so pale, and lost consciousness soon after that. Right then, I still remembered I was doing my Physics ten-year-series on bed. Two days later, the doctor finally comfirmed, that she has passed away. I didn't break down on that day, didn't do some drama, but I still couldn't hold back a bit of my tears. I was devastated, and right till now, I wish things have been different. What was with me since small, has finally gone. Then EL and MT N-level oral came in July. I thought I did okay, better than the last time, which was very pleasing to hear. The Prelims came, on the month we celebrated Singapore's National Day. On our BYD on that same month, the President even turned up at our school! I still couldn't believe he came, with all of his bodyguards, staff and the car. The President was nice; he smiled and shook hands with some others. September came, and it was the fasting month. It was also the starting of some N-level papers and meant more revision. Finally, the muslims including me, celebrated Hary Raya Puasa on the first of October. Despite the joyous occasion, we still had to keep reminding oursleves, not all of the N-level papers were over, and that we still had to study for the rest of the papers which we hadn't sat yet. Well, after one week and a half, the exams were finally over, which all of us sighed a relief. High School Musical 3 even came out in theatres on the 24th. I watched the trailer, and the movie was too cool to miss. Well, I sat for my madrasah's exam on the 31st, and that meant exams had offically ended for that year. November came. There were Maths remedial, and the month also meant that we had to shop for things like dresses for our Prom Night. The Prom was a blast, but I hope it will be better than this during our Poly Prom Night. The last month of the year finally came, and I caught Twilight in theatres! It was totally awesome, and I could just expressed it in so many words. If I do right now, it wouldn't end. Before Twilight, I also caught City of Ember. This movie, is the adventurous kind. Well I like adventures. My bro and I went to Kelantan to visit our father and his side of family there. It was nice for us and certainly took me some time to understand what they were talking about though. After that, the N-level results were released on the 18th, and there were some happy and sad faces. I was one of the happy ones, but I was still not please with my results. I know I could have done better than that. Then, my bro and I went for our last holiday in Selangor last week. We also went to KL and Port Dickson. For our last movie, we watched Bedtime Stories, and the movie was hilarious. Too hilarious. There was a part where Skeeter couldn't talk properly so he had his tongue out because a bee had bitten it. Then his friend did the talking for him, and said alligator, when it was elevator instead. It was really funny. The movie was really nice to watch.

And so, my post ends here. I'll post some recent pics some other day.

Later, and Happy New Year guys!!!

2008-12-20T15:31:00.005+08:00

Hey! Today, I'm gonna make a short post, cause I don't intend to spent a long time on making a post. Anyway, these are a just a few pics of me, my bro and my anak sedare from Kelantan.

So, as you can see, all of us were eating corns just like that and the girl beside me is the 11 year old, and the small boy is the six year old anak sedares. We were on a beach, where people fly big kites. Anyway, I like the beach. It's nice, very nice. And the boy is so cute! And I'm missing them, especially him already! Hope to see them again soon.

Later!!

P.s I didn't take pictures of other things, like for example, my dad's kampong. Will do during our next visit, though.

2008-12-19T10:18:00.004+08:00

Today, I'll be catching Twilight with a bestie! Finally! Twilight!! Edward Cullen, here I come!

We'll be meeting at 12.30pm at CCK MRT, and as usual, watch it at Causeway. Wow! Certainly can't wait! I've been dying to watch it ever since I heard it would be release on the 18th of this month!

Oh yeah, I also passed all of my 'N' level subjects, and that I got promoted to Sec 5! Syukur Alhamdullilah. Amin. I got 8 points. Congratulations to me and everyone who has made it to Sec 5! Hope everyone, including myself, will be able to cope with our studies next year no matter what. Insyallah. Amin. Don't give up, and don't run away from it. Cause it won't stay where you left it but come after you! Remember this line people! And I should too.

Well, gotta go!!

P.s Can't wait! Twilight!!

2008-12-19T09:27:00.002+08:00

Morning!

I'm baacck! I reached home at 1 plus in the morning two days ago. Phew. That was late. My dad, bro and I took the bus which left at 9 or 10 plus in the morning. Then, halfway, the bus driver told us that we had to change to another bus because the bus broke down. What? And so, halfway, we stopped and waited for the new bus. We were told that it would come four hours later. Four hours is waaay too long. Besides, there was nothing to do other than just sitting there, and talk to each other. We just had our lunch. Then suddenly, like less than hour later or something, the bus could be driven again, but has to be brought at a lower speed while the new bus catch up with us. I was like, okay.. When I woke up, I found that the bus seemed to come to a stop, and that it was in the middle of the road, where there are so little houses, or shops. The driver then told of us to change buses. I realised then, that there was another bus behind our bus. I was stunned. The bus did catch up with us fast, cause our bus didn't really go that slow. Actually, I thought we went quite fast. Anyway, I was relieved, cause I would never know when we'll be arriving at Larkin. After the transfer of people and bags, we finally continued our journey, and this time, the bus was cold. Again. So, as you can see, we should have arrived at Larkin around 8 or 9 at night, but due to some technical problem, we reached there at 11 plus. I was really pleased to get down at Larkin, cause I thought I was coming down with rhuematism. My eyes were heavy and my knees were in pain. I think it must have gone rusty overnight. No, maybe gone rusty over just a few hours. My knees will start to pain when I'm sitting for too long. When I start to walk again, seriously, I think I had iron or rock for breakfast.

Well, the days my brother and I spend in Kelantan were fun, okay. I thought it wouldn't be this satisfying. But we certainly want to visit our family on our dad's side again, and have planned to stay loneger. Perhaps one or two weeks stay. I met my two of my cousins, both married. The younger one, who's 28 years said I was naughty when I was small. Haha. I just smiled. I met my anak sedare too, one is 11 and the other only 6. The small one was so cute. He's not shy around people. I met my grandmother, finally, and I also met my aunt-in-law. I met my newly wed cousin's wife and some of my father's friends. The surprising thing is, even my dad's friends wanted to meet me and my brother. I'm curious why. It's funny. They were like very excited to meet us or something. And one of them asked whether I've got a boyfriend. I said no, of course. Even if I had, I wouldn't say yes. Yeah, if my dad got to know this, he'll definitely forbid me. When I think of this question again, I'll feel like laughing. It's too funny. He told me I looked like I have a boyfriend. Haha. I looked like? What was that suppose to mean? I didn't understood him that far. But thanks for the honesty. It certainly made me smile. Other than going to my dad's food shop almost every night, we went to the beach, where the waves are big and people fly big kites. The sand were not that much too. We also went to pasar malam, where they call it pasar borong. We went to a shopping centre, called KB Mall. It was big, and I went for a little bit of shopping, where as my dad was bored walking here and there in that place. Haha. We also went here and there, to places like the small shops. I also got to ride my dad's motorcycle. At last. Riding a motorbike. I could just smile all the way during my first time in 15 years. There, there were also cows, even goats. But goats which looked like little goats. One thing I didn't like was the mud. As it was the raining season there, the mud was always full of water and muddy. There was a time, after visiting a friend of my dad's house, I accidentally walked on a pool of mud. It had just stopped raining earlier on, and I was like, uh! Mud splashed on my blue Giordano jeans. Ergh. Then I quickly washed using the tap nearby. The place was quite dark as it was dimly lit. You can't really see where you are going, sometimes.

On my first day there, I didn't really understand the way they speak. Like terbelit-belit gitu. But slowly, I could understand a bit. It was the first time I tasted the Nasi Pattaya and curry puffs there. One thing was for sure, I couldn't stop being jumpy in my dad's kampong. First, I met a croakcoach on the way to my room. Second, I thought I saw a cat or a dog emerging from my dad's room in the kitchen, so I was like, jumping and starting to run away. But when I looked again, it was actually my dad. I walked away quickly, and dalam hati, I was like laughing at myself. I got 20 RM together from my dad's friends' wife and mother, my aunt gave us 50 RM each and my grand gave us 50 RM each too before we left. When I was leaving, my 6 year old anak sedare, called me, to salam me. From a normal expression, he suddenly looked sad and I though he was going to cry, but he didn't. Then he salam me. I smiled at him before making my way out. He's so cute. Just the night before, we had played tongue wagging at each other. He was lying in the living room, waiting for me to take a Chipsmore biscuit while I was in my room. Actually, the biscuit packet was mine, and I gave it to him when he said he wanted it. But I didn't even got to eat the biscuit with him, cause he left with his parents just after I left the toilet without saying anything. In any case, everyone there was nice.

2008-12-09T16:51:00.002+08:00

Hey all! Just a short update. I'll be going to Kelantan with my bro this coming Friday. We'll be back in Singapore, I guess by this Tuesday.

Well, the 'N' level results are coming soon, and pray for me that I'll pass and that I get to go to Sec 5 next year, even though my results are not what I hope them to be. They are on the 18th right? Well, insyallah, I'll pass. Amin. I hope my everyone gets to go to Sec 5 next year too.

And maybe best friends, Nadiah and Hanisah and I will be catching City Of Ember tomorrow at Bugis! Hope the movie will be fun.

My relatives are planning to go to Malaysia for a holiday, around the Christmas period. Maybe we'll be going to Perak. Have never been there before. Hope the holiday is fun.

And of course, good luck to all for those who are, like me, waiting for their reults next week!

Later!!

P.s Tc

2008-12-03T16:14:00.012+08:00

Two days ago which is a Monday, I went cycling with my long time best friends, Nadiah and Hanisah. Along with my brother. Here are some pictures we took:

Our first stop.

My brother

The yellow bike is his.

Our 2nd stop: The Jetty

Wow, nice forest.

Like how the pic works.

Nadiah and Hanisah with my bro, Akmal.

Me, Nadiah and Hanisah.

We took a picture, where I could barely be seen. Funny.

Wow. The tree, and us. Fascinating.

It's not wrong to hug the tree!

Nice job, Nisah!

No Nisah, you can't break that door of my beautiful home no matter what.

Tak jadi lah tu. Hahas.

Peace!

My castle.. gone.. Who did it?! I demand you to tell me!

Back at home, safe and sound.

Well, it was certainly fun, especially being able to hang out with them again. We had lunch at Mac first before cycling, and cycled for two hours. After cycling, we went to play games at the arcade near the Macdonald. After playing arcade games like, for the first time in a few years, we went down to the first level to bowl. Oh yeah, playing the para para was certainly fun. Hanisah and me scored way to the final stage. Congrats. And playing it was my first. Bowling was fun too, and I managed to realise again about why the sport was fun. Well, I scored the least. Thanks for trying. After that, we headed to Parkway Parade to play arcade games again, and honestly, that was the first time for me and my bro to go there. Hanisah and Nadiah played para para again, and I played the basketball game, where you had to shoot balls to the hoop continously until the time's out. My bro, played the driving car kind of games. After that, we bought bubble tea each, and headed home. We hugged each other before saying our goodbyes and separated. Well, we are planning for another outing. Whatever it is, we'll be the best of friends forever, till we grow old. Haha.

And I hope we'll have more outings and spend as much time as possible before the end of the year.

xoxo

Aqilah

2008-12-03T15:00:00.013+08:00

Hello there! Last Wednesday, some mates and I went BBQ at East Coast Park. And some girlfriends: Fatin and Aisha, and I went cycling too. It was fun, and it was the first time for me when we went to Changi there, near the end point. Here are some pics we took:

Before cycling

Stopping by..

Beautiful flowers.

Beautiful wind.

Okay, this was seriously funny. Haha.

After cycling.

Nice trees.

Bored or what?

Blow, wind. Blow through my hair.

At Bugis, otw home. Wish I could ride that and take me to Santa Lane!

Beautiful Christmas tree.

There was a photo where it shows I was falling but isn't posted here. Well, we had planned to jump when the picture is being taken. You know, like the HSM cast. The way everyone jump. But, unfortunately, I fell straight away after I jumped. We were jumping on the seats. Haha. In the end, I hurt my arm, and there was a lot of blood. Okay, maybe I was exaggerating. There was blood, but the bruise wasn't big as if the blood covered the whole of my arm. Well, I hope it will heal soon. I was lucky not to have a broken arm though. If I did, I think I would have fainted then. Haha. Drama queen.

2008-11-25T20:12:00.007+08:00

Hello there!

Tomorrow and the next day after that my mates and I have planned to go for a BBQ at East Coast Park. Some of us are also planning to go cycling. I think most of us will. Or maybe not. Anyway, my brother will be following as he so much wants to go out and go cycling. He's so bored at home. Okay, I still don't know what to wear tomorrow. Hope it'll be fun! And memorable, enjoyable!

So, as you can see, I've changed my blog skin again; this time the skin has something to do with the upcoming movie, Twilight. It's about vampires, and I've always like stories about vampires. Well, this movie is not only about vampires, it's a love story too! A girl and a vampire met and fell in love. I think the vampire saw the girl first. Anyway, what's more, the vampire guy is Robert Pattinson, who played Cedric Diggory in Harry Potter and The Goblet Of Fire! How cool! But sadly, Cedric died in that series. Well, in any case, Robert is just so handsome. He's got such a handsome face. Wow. I'll be drooling in my seat if I were to watch Twilight. I can't wait to catch the movie! And here are some pictures from the movie (the first two are posters though):

And I've changed another song to HSM 3's Now Or Never. This song rocks!

Later!!

P.s Hope all of us, especially me, will enjoy ourselves tomorrow!

2008-11-20T14:46:00.016+08:00

Hello there!

Last Monday's prom night was certainly a blast, and here are some pictures I took! Enjoy!

On the way to our prom..

Reached the hotel. At the lobby.

With Amira.

With Fatin.

What cha' doing? Not looking at msgs, pics!

Nice pic

With Suhana.

Last performance. Nice dance!

With Fiona.

And...

'The Couple of The Year' !

Haha. Just kidding. With Azhar.

With Ms Chua, Co Form and Bio teacher

With Ivan. What on earth was he doing?? Lol.

With Sufyan. So wow.

With Jun Wei. As adorable as ever.

With Mr Chang, Form and Maths teacher.

With Huiluan and Xue Wen. Oh, gorgeous us.

My face was so white. Okay, don't look at me!

Us, the six beaus.

Besties! :-)

Moi, kinda fooling around. Trying to make a twix there.

With Nurul. She looked so pretty.

With Adleen. Finally, a pic with her.

On the way back home.

Finally at home. Still able to smile.

Me without specs.

My ring.

Pics with my dear brother.

Actually, he's goofing around.

Finally, it ends with a nice pic of us.

2008-11-15T19:48:00.002+08:00

Hello, again!

I realised a few minutes ago, that I forgot to write something. Well, here goes.

While I was in the train on the way to Bugis, I saw a guy, a tall guy, walked in. I was sitting on one of the two seats which were facing the entrance. So I could see people come and go. Then, there was this gur, who suddenly came in. He boarded the train somewhere a few stops after Jurong East MRT. OKay, he came in, stood infront of me, and laid down his laptop which was in his laptop bag on the floor while he held the string. You know, sling bag. Okay, he was tall. And as I had nothing to do, I observed him. At first I looked at how he dresses. He knows how to dress; a red tee, white 3/4 pants with white sneakers. White sneakers? Yeah, same as what I was wearing during that tiime! Only different kind of shoes. Then, he hung his laptop bag around his body and slowly took out his paper or something, but I could see he was holding a foolscap pad. He was reading, or revising something. When I saw how he dressed, I moved to the looks and the hair. He had nice hair, that kind of hairstyle, a bit like the Korean guys. I saw that he was wearing a pair of glasses too, as he was standing more to the left. Then I started to be fond of him. He was so ccute! He was like trying to revise something, as if it's exam period. I thought he was a Poly student or something, but he dropped at Outram Park station. I thought he was going to drop at Dover station but Outram Park? Any poly or U that's near there? I have no idea.

There were some parts that he was trying to balance himself. He wasn't holding on to any railing and I was like, 'Oh, it's okay. If you fall, I'll try to grab hold of you.' But that's what I said in my heart. Then, he went and leaned on after a few people dropped off. I think he noticed me. I think he must have felt someone looking at him. I know he must have.

Well, he finally left. I was like, so over the moon looking at him. When he left, I said 'Bye' and 'Hope to see you again soon'.

How cuute!

2008-11-15T12:05:00.003+08:00

Good afternoon, everyone!

First update is, I've bought my dress for the prom already! Yaay! I bought it last Thurs, which was two days ago from one of the shops in City Plaza. I went to look for my dress with Fatin. When we first arrived, we went to have our lunch at Banquet, where it's oppostie City Plaza. And that's when I first knew that there was a Banquet, and even KFC there! Have never went or walk near there before. After having Chicken Rice and iced Milk Tea, we took the bridge which led right into the third level of City Plaza. There, the dress I bought was one of the dresses that caught my attention. So, okay, the price was okay, and there was a discount. So moved on to see other dresses. So far, the ones on level three caught my attention. There was even a shop which selled so many dresses that were nice. Finally, came to a conclusion and went back to the second shop, and I tried on the dress. It fits; just nice. Fatin said I looked okay, and even the lady said I looked okay. After looking at the mirror for a minute or so, and considering how I look with the dress on, I decided to buy it. After 20% discount, it wa $48. Just nice for my budget. I love the dress. It's gold on top and black from the stomach and below. It also came with a belt. But unfortunately, the belt is a little bit too big for me, so I have to make extra holes.

Then the next day, which was yesterday, Fatin and I went to Bugis. After I had Shrooms' Meal at KFC, we went to Bugis Street. I wanted to find accesories to go with my dress, but just bought one bangle. Fatin also wanted to look for watches. For herself, and for her friend. Finally she bought them. Her watch was nice, and the watch she chose for her friend was nice too. We were joking and laughing. But so far, that watch was one of the nicest watch I've seen for a guy. The design must be new. After that, we went to Bussorah St, Bugis Junction and the National Library. There we took some pics and just like, chilled out. After that, we headed home, as it was like already, 5 o'clock. And I reached home at 6pm. That's nice. An hour from here to there.

The girls haven't decided how to get to York Hotel at Orchard. Our prom starts at 7 pm, and so we have to leave the house like, around 5 pm or so. We can't take a taxi cause the charges will be high from 5-8pm. If we still want to take a taxi, we have to be prepared to fork out some cash. If I take a bus or train, I'll have to walk to the hotel. It's not like we know exactly where the hotel is situated. It's just not a lucky time. I have to walk, without shelter, if I want to go to the MRT or bus interchange near my home. I'd be dressed so nicely, I'm not gonna ruin it just like that. Somehow, I have to find a suitable way of getting to the venue. Uh.

Well, see everyone there!

P.s Just two days to the big day/night! There must be some way I could get to the hotel!

2008-11-12T15:25:00.002+08:00

Hey there. Guess what? I've got my left ear pierced! Yay for me! Hahaha.

Anyway, after Maths remedial, after stopping buy at Mr Bean, Sweetalk, Gurdian, Donut, we headed to the gold shop beside the UOB bank at Plaza. I asked Su and Fatin to go in with me who were there at the time. When I've told a lady there that I wanted to pierce my left ear, she got the necessary equipment. I was told to sit at a chair, where there weren't so many people nearby. There were some people buying jewellery of course. Okay, I already got seated at my chair. I was nervous, and a bit scared. I tried to calm down. Then the lady rubbed some, oil or something, I think to make it less painful like when you're getting an injection. The other lady asked me to relax and that it would not take a sec. But I just could not stop being nervous. Su and Fatin just stood a short distance away from me. I was actually amused that they wanted to see the whole thing. Haha. First time watching? Me? Don't need to ask. Alot of times watching myself! Anyway, I just grabbed hold of my bag, and waited. I closed my eyes, and a few seconds later, I opedned them again, and I was like, "Is it done already?". Haha. I didn't even feel anything! Nak done ape? Maybe I thought I was too scared so I wouldn't feel a thing. Okay, then, it was time. The lady who 'shot' my ear, said, "Okay, okay ah." and said '1, 2, 3' in Chinese. Luckily I could understand that bit of Chinese so I got myself at the most ready part when she said 3. And then, shot. I opened my eyes. I was like, "Tu je?". Haha. I'd thought it was gonna hurt more than that, but actually it doesn't hurt so much. I think it hurt more when I got my ears pierced in a clinic two years ago. I think my ears that time already dah lame tak 'touch', so it hurt more. Well, alhamdullilah, I've gotten my ear pierced, and it didn't hurt so much! :-)

Okay, will be meeting my bestie as we planned at Jurong East MRT's platform at 11am tomorrow. Yeah. Hope she won't be late. I hope I won't be too.

Fatin suddenly reminded me, that we'll be having a course about hairstyling and make up. Or is that what they are called? It's together with the package when we paid for the prom. The course will be in our school before the big night. But what time will it be? 10am? Yeah, I'd love to go, but I'd be so in a rush. My house isn't exactly that near you knoow!

Anyway, I heard from a friend, Jessica, that all the girls in class will be going to the prom except one. Well, that's cool. The more the merrier.

Alright, gotta go. Later!

xxx

2008-11-11T17:54:00.003+08:00

Hello! Finally get to use the computer and got the chance to play Auditionsea, and I won thousands of dens from battle party! Cool.

Anyway, here it goes.

Last Thursday, was awesome. Totally. After having lunch at Burger King, we rented our bikes, and I forgot that Aisha couldn't ride a bicycle. No wonder she didn't know whether to rent a bike or not in the first place. And we got free mineral water bottles! Cool. Anyway, at last she did, and we began cycling. At first, we tried to teach Aisha how to cycle. So the boys just went off without us. It took, maybe for ages for her to master the skill. Well, at last she did! Congrats! WE played for three hours, cycled here and there. Boy, was it a warm day. And I hate when my hair went every direction when I cycle. Can't it just stay put? Felt like wearing a cap, or a bandana that time. Okay, maybe not that time, this time actually. And, guess what. Aisha's bike hit my bike when I was pausing on the side with Fatin's little bro, Farid. I was caught last minute, and her bike just crashed into mine. I can't believe Aisha couldn't stop it. Anyway, at first we didn't fell or anything. But her bike was weighing on me. It was heavy, and I felt like I could fall. So I just fell kan je lah when Aisha didn't do anything. That's why they found it funny! I fell quite slow motionly somemore they said. Urgh. Then, I got up, and separated Aisha's and my bicycles apart. It was stucked together. Fortunately, there weren't many people there at the time, except for a group of younger kids slightly further down the small hill. So after all of us had returned our bikes at around 5.30pm, we relaxed and chilled a bit. The boys played with that thing; what's it called? That thing can be thrown, and it will fly to somewhere. So Amira, Aisha and I went back home a few minutes after that as Fatin's father was going to fetch her and her bro. On the way to the bustop, Amira and I bought bubble tea. Hmm! And I reached home at around 8pm. Just as what I had expected befoore.

So, I hope to have something like that again. Hanging out with my mates. But I hope the next time we go cycling again, we'll cycle together. And go for an adventure somewhere. Maybe in some woods or something? Haha. I mean, in some forest or something? You know I like adventures kind of stuff..

Okay, right now, I'm just fed up with the TV. It just won't switch on. What's wrong with it?

Alright. The moment of truth. Okay stop being dramatic. Hehe.

This Thurs, my bestie and I will be going to City Plaza to look for my prom dress. I haven't bought it, and don't give me that look. Then the next day after that, we'll be out to, maybe Bugis Street to look for my accessories. I'll use my raya bag and shoes for my prom. And tomorrow, insyallah, I will get my ear pierced after Maths remedial. And insyallah, I will get my hair cut too. Either the day before or a few hours before the big night itself, I'll go to the salon to get my hair done. I've asked my aunt, and she gave me some cash for my dress and hair! How cool! :-)

I really hope to get these things done ASAP. And I hope to post my prom night pictures here very soon after the prom.

So, just wait, and keep on rocking.

P.s Can't wait to see the others there duing the prom!

xxx

Aqilah

2008-11-08T15:24:00.002+08:00

Hey everyone! What's up? I can never say that in my very good mood.

Anyway, some of my classmates and I went to East Coast last Thursday, and one word, AWESOME! It was totally awesome, and I wish we will go again, hopefully, with more people. The more the merrier.

I can't begin my story today, but insyallah, on this Monday. Maybe I will.

Well, they are planning for a BBQ to be held at East Coast. I'm not sure if I'm going. I haven't ask for my guardian's permisson. They are planning for a two night stay there too. Night stay? Yeah right. I'll be surprise if I can a few nights there. I have a feeling the teachers are coming. Cause they are planning night stays there. Will they be so brave to spend the night there alone without any adults? Haha. I think not. In any case, I really hope I wil be able to go. This is one of the times when you get to chill with your mates, your friends. I don't wanna miss the chance. I don't spend my every moment with them. I love them.

Anyway, I'm still very looking forward to shopping for my prom things! Like hello.. As according to a bestie, she said there are only 10 day to the big day! Ok, she said that yesterday. But. Uh!

Okay, gotta run.

Later!

2008-11-08T14:32:00.002+08:00

I'm not good enough for you. Don't choose me, cause I'm not the person who you think I am. You don't know me.. In fact, I don't think I'm 100% good enough for anybody. If you really know me, and I know you, really, then I guess it's okay..

2008-11-03T14:41:00.003+08:00

Hello everyone! Apparently, I'm not as comfortable sitting on this chair compared to my old chair when I was still staying in Bukit Panjang. Somehow, I just wanted to type it in 'Bedok' instead of BP. Shrugs.

Anyway, I've moved! We've moved. Well, the good side is, it's near Jurong Point. Thaat's good. Jurong Point. I wonder why they named it like that. Maybe inside that shopping mall has a point? Haha. I dunno what I'm talking about, but just make it like that.

I just came back from Maths remedial; reached here like about 2.05 or something. If it weren't for Su, I would have taken 187, which according to her is a long journey. So I took 180 from the BP int. Boarded the bus like about 1.19, and reached the Jurong sports complex we usually go to for swimming at 1.40 or so. Then reached the Boon Lay int at 1.50 approximately. Okay, I've been trying to get used to this place and live as comfortably as I can.

This Thurs, they are planning to go East Coast. Going cycling or rollerblading, isn't it? Well I prefer cycling, cause rollerblading isn't my thing, really. I can just balance, but move around? Haha. I'll be left behind. So can't wait! And, my bestie and I are planning to go to Penin and Bugis. I want to go to Penin to buy black skinny jeans. Need to buy a new one. And she wants to go to Bugis because she hasn't gone there for quite some time?

So, in any case, I really hope I will have the strength, courage, bravery and confidence to move on. Move forward. It takes me a great deal to do that.

Okay, I'm okay for now.

:-) Later!

P.s I love my friends. I really do. :-)

2008-10-30T23:15:00.003+08:00

Hello everyone.

I'm just here to say, that tonight will be my last night sleeping in this house.. I'm halfway into packing, and I really hate to leave. I'm looking at the scenery below, where the badminton courts's lights are already switched off. It's always switched off at 10pm. Anyway.. my neighbourhood is quiet, like it usually is every night. I will miss the furnitures outside; my mum bought the blue sofa, I still remember the day the yellow sofa were brought to my house in Bedok North then, I still remember the first time I saw the blue sofa and I still remember the day when I went shopping with my mum to buy the dinner table. We bought it at Courts, was it? Or it was either Ikea. I feel ssoooo sad.. I'll be sleeping on my bed for the last time too. I'm gonna miss my cupboard, my room, the fridge, kitchen, my mum's room; where I spent my time continuing sleeping after or waiting for my bro to wake up for school. That's when my cousins from Johore were still spending their stay here at the starting of this month. I am sooo going to miss my freedom. I'm gonna miss this house, my house, where I call home.

I'm starting to feel unhappy already. Like, yeah, I was already feeling unhappy waaaay before this. I'm so sick of being troubled, sick of feeling stress, sick of feeling sad and bitter and miserable. I'm waaaay sick of it! I'm tired, just give me some rest. Next year is 'O' level year, and I'm gonna crack if this goes on! I'm waaay sick of it to care!

Anyway, I'm sleepy and would have turned in by now, but I'm sacrificing part of my sleeping time to post. Because, I won't have any freedom to do this once I'm under someone's roof already. I'm keeping my mouth shut, and that's good enough already. This is probably the hardest moment in my life.

Nothing they do can make me happy. Just give me back my life, and I will be happy. I'm miserable. I see my mum, I'll be so happy. She's like an angel. Nothing can repair the shattered pieces of my heart. Two days ago, before I fell asleep, I wanted so much to see my mum again, as in in real life form. Then, that night, I dreamt that my mum was alive again, and I was so happy when I saw her. She seemed alright, no sadness or anything. I salam her hand. After that, I salam her hand many times as if I hadn't had enough yet. I smiled while I did that. I was really overcome with happiness. Or maybe glad. Really, I was REALLY pleased to see her. When I woke up the next morning, I realised my wish was granted. Well, thanks. I felt better seeing my mum again. But I'm missing her so muuch already. You sometimes miss someone badly when you can't find your happiness. I'll be sooo satisfied and grateful and I wouldn't ask for more if I could help it if I were given to live here instead of being forced to move out. Sometimes, when I speak to my brother, I'll feel that kind of feeling, where you know you are talking with your family. Cause he's all I have left. All I have near me.

Actually, I'v never hated my dad. I love him and accept him as my family way before I could speak. I long for the time when I'll finally be allowed to have my OWN roof, when I can finally speak up for myself instead of having to listen to others. I wil definitely look forward to that. I'm very looking forward to the day when I feel I've found my happiness and freedom.

2008-10-23T13:32:00.002+08:00

Nobody can take over me, except ME. Seriously. I know they are my elders, SO WHAT? I've had enough of this, cause no matter what, how long this goes on, it will still be the SAME. I'm a 16 year old girl, not some 6 year old. Please, I have my own mind, and I have my own way of thinking. I'm starting to dislike them bit by bit, I don't mean I hate them to the core, but they are kinda annoying.

Lets get this straight. I lost my mum like about five months ago, and I was really sad by it. I have a younger brother who's annoying at times too. We don't get along sometimes. Fight. Then, there's this house. We need to rent or sell it. But better rent it. So that means my brother and I have to move out and in with either one of our relatives. WHAT? Move in with them? You have GOT to be kidding me. I don't know why, but I grew up not that close to them, even with their children, except my cousins from Johore. That's why my face lights up whenever I see them. But not my other cousins. Seriously. I've never been close to them since I was small. I've always been close to my cousins from Johore since I was like, 3, 4 or 5 years old. Or maybe younger, who knows. It's just too bad I'm not close to the rest of my cousins. What can they do about it. I'm 16 already. A bit too late for all that getting to know a bit about each other. I hate the fact when my aunt asked me to come along with her to somewhere I don't have friends. You knoww. This is a fact, not a gossip. This is a blog, that's where I pour all my heart out. Yeah, sometimes I wish I hang out with at least most of my cousins. But, we are NOT close. They range from 3 to 14 years old. The 13 and 14 years old are boys, who likes to hang out with the younger boys. Ergh. My dear cousins are made up of four; two girls; 10 and 13 and two boys; 16 and 20. Yeah, I use to be kinda close to the oldest one when I was younger. Well, they are not that close to the rest of their Singapore cousins, same as me. We have a lot in common, and that's why we like to hang out with each other most of the time.

Anyway, it's time for people to get mad with me. It's just time. It's sooner or later. If you think I'm a goody goody two shoes, you are kidding yourself. Please. I'm a teenager, and every teenager may have a bad side. Actually, put away my good side, I'm an disobedient and a disrespectful child. Seriously. Think about it. Once, my mum got angry with me, and I meeeaan really angry. We didn't even speak for days. It was a few days, if I'm not wrong. At last, we spoke to each other. Maybe that's when my mum got over the problem with me. Although we started to talk to each other, I didn't even say sorry to her for making a mistake. I admit, I was at fault. But actually, I should have apologise to her. Too bad. I'm an disobedient and a disrespectful child. I didn't even tried to talk to her first. Sheeessh. What kind of a person am I??

So, if you wanna get mad with me, go ahead. You have your reasons.

2008-10-21T17:59:00.003+08:00

Hey!

This week is kinda when we start our holidays. Well, we don't need to be in school. The rest (Sec 1s, 2s and 3s) need though. I think. In any case, I've asked my guardian if I can work during the holidays, and she gave me the permission. At first, I shooed the idea away, as my besties are not up to the idea, and furthermore, my aunt didn't give me the green light. Weell... When I think back, again, yeah, I do really need cash. To buy things I want. Cause the Hari Raya money wasn't enough. Seriously. But still, ahhhh! Work as an operator?? I wish I didn't have to think so much.

Anyway, maybe I'll be going out of the country this holidays. I have to visit my dad so that means I have to go to Malaysia. What? Without my mum, or my bro, or anyone else? Me, there, alone? Please cancel out that idea. Besides that, maybe I'll spend a few days in Johore where my closest cousins stay. Okay. They stay in a kampong, where they are mice, snakes, and other kinds of animals I don't wish to meet. I think it will be a bit like a survival camp for me. If I do spend nights there, please pray that I'll have an enjoyable time there. Thanks.

Besides aaalll that, there will be Maths remedial lessons. What? Well, luckily it's only like four or five lessons. They are planning to go cycling at East Coast on the 5th of Nov which is next Wednesday. I love to go. But I hope more people would go. The more the merrier.

Okay, life has been like a roller coaster for me. Sometimes it's hard, and sometimes I feel just satisfied. But very recently, it's hard. I can just not put on a smile all day. Insyallah, I will be able to overcome this obstacles. It's just a test from Him. A test. How hard can it be. I've taken so many tests in school, I'm sure I will be able to do this one.

Alright, there is just a week left to the end of celebrating Hari Raya. Just enjoy while we can yeah?

Later!!